Tuesday, November 20, 2012

555 {Mia Bella Photography, Louisville, KY}

555...

It has a very important message.

And without fail, almost every single day my eyes will land on the clock when it says, 5:55.

Those numbers used to haunt me. It was on 05-05-05 that we lost a pregnancy carrying twins. Every time I would see those numbers I'd feel like they were following me, reminding me of that horrific date - taunting me. But about a year ago, this still quiet voice spoke to my heart, calmed my spirit and turned those numbers into a reminder of a different kind. Ashes into beauty... three of my favorite words - taking the end of one and turning into the life of something new.

So no longer does my heart ache when I see those three little fives together - instead my heart rejoices in knowing that He sent that date not to harm us, but to give us hope and a future.

Many of you have read our testimony, for those who are new and have not... here is the complete backstory behind 05-05-05.

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In October of 2004, my husband Marty and I decided to begin the journey of starting our family. In late March 2005, we found out we were pregnant. However, excitement quickly turned to worry and anxiety, as the next few weeks were met with complications and many doctor’s visits. At 7 and a half weeks, on May 5th, 2005, I miscarried.

The next day landed us back at the doctors, where we discovered that I had lost a baby, but amazingly to our surprise, there was another baby still there. We were pregnant with twins. However, we learned that the second baby’s heartbeat was very slow and only had a 5% chance of survival. We tried to be hopeful as 5% was better than the 0% we thought we had the night before. But that night another horrible miscarriage followed and we knew, both of our babies were lost. Being a Christian, rationally I knew that God had a reason for this, but I didn’t understand. I was angry, bitter and jealous. I mourned the loss of not one, but two little lives that I would never get to see or hold on this earth. I thought God had “taken” them from us. With the loss, a traumatic ER experience and the flood of hormones, I crumbled. My rock of a husband through it all crashed and burned a month later. We were both so grievous, turning not to each other for strength and certainly not to God. The enemy found his loophole and tried to destroy us. We thought the quick solution would be just to get pregnant again, to replace the loss. So as months passed and turned into a year, sadness and desperation grew unbearable.

It was during that year, hearts broken, we sat side by side at Northeast Christian Church here in Louisville. We knew we needed to come back to our Father - we came to the foot of the cross.

One Sunday, months later, we listened to the pastor tell the parable of the Persistent Widow. We had no way of knowing just how important Luke 18:1 would become in our lives. “Then Jesus told his disciples a parable to show them that they should always pray and never give up.”  The chapter goes on to tell the parable, “In a certain town there was a judge who neither feared God nor cared about men. And there was a widow in that town who kept coming to him with the plea, Grant me justice against my adversary. For some time he refused. But finally he said to himself, Even though I don't fear God or care about men, yet because this widow keeps bothering me, I will see that she gets justice. And the Lord said, Listen to what the unjust judge says. And will not God bring about justice for his chosen ones, who cry out to him day and night? Will he keep putting them off? I tell you, he will see that they get justice, and quickly. However, when the Son of Man comes, will he find faith on the earth?"

The sermon taught about how important persistent prayer is, that He is not bothered by our prayers day and night, He welcomes them and will answer them. When we opened our bulletins, we saw a yellow card and an envelope. We were instructed to write on the cards what we would be persistently praying about for the next two months. The Pastor told us that he would send them back to us after those two months to see how God had used our persistent prayers. I bet you can guess what we wrote on those cards. We addressed the envelopes to ourselves and sent them to the end of the aisle.

We took the promise very seriously. Instead of wallowing in our self-pity, we turned our sights back on Christ and His will for us. Every day we prayed that the Lord would bless us with a baby in His timing. And He began to heal us.

Visiting my doctor again that next month, we decided to begin the steps of fertility treatments. So my first prescription for Clomid, a fertility drug, was written for me. We were uncertain about this next step, fearful of the medications, so we continued to pray for His will for us. I decided to wait a few days before filling the prescription, and good thing I did – the Lord had his own plan. We calculate that almost to the day of the two-month mark of our persistent prayers – He answered - we were pregnant.

Astonishment accompanied by the overwhelming feeling of mercy and grace of our loving God, here was His plan. It wasn’t until we set our sights on Him, let go of the control, what did He want for our lives, what was His timing, in our persistence He taught us to pray and never give up.

It wasn’t long after we found out that we were pregnant that in the mail we received two very familiar envelopes. Our pastor had kept his promise, praying for our heart’s desires along with us and then sending the envelopes back. We knew the Lord had a plan for us, to teach us, to heal us; we just had to let go and let Him take control. Jeremiah 29:11 says, “For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." So there is our story, 2 years, 2 lost loves, 2 little yellow cards, 2 months persistent prayer and on April 28, 2007 1 amazing miracle was born. Mia Katharine Worth.




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